Here I Stand

For as long as I can remember, I have believed the five points of Calvinism to be Scripturally sound. Not because John Calvin said it, but because I believe that the teachings of John Calvin were the result of Calvin's ardent, prayerful and accurate study of the Word of God. [side note: something interesting that I learned not too long ago was that John Calvin did not actually coin the TULIP, or the five points of Calvinism--they were gathered together after his death, in response to the "five points of Arminianism."] For those unfamiliar, the five points of Calvinism, fondly called the TULIP, are:

• Total Depravity of Man
• Unconditional Election
• Limited Atonement
• Irresistible Grace
• Perseverance/Preservation of the Saints

I won't try to expound on these points, because I'll be here all night, and I have a lot of sleeping on which to catch up. The bottom line is, I believe in these five things as five points God made in His Word. I prefer not to call myself a Calvinist, because over the years I've seen the stigma attached to the term, and I don't like it. "Calvinists are closed-minded...Calvinists are so pleased with their own theology...Calvinists are theological elitists." No thank you. Unfortunately, in some cases, I'm inclined to agree. So I prefer to call myself a Christian, and that's all. My theology comes second to my relationship with Christ.

Years ago, when I was even more of a pain to listen to than I am now, I used to post on Christian message boards and debate/argue theology with many other Christians. It started out innocently enough...new Christians asking questions of the "more mature" [12-16-year-old] Christians on the site. Naturally the topic of predestination/election came up, and of course I got involved, being the feisty 13-year-old that I was. It got very out of hand many times, and at the end of each discussion I felt both attacked and furious that the person on the other end could be so ignorant. Yep, sounds like Calvinism all right. So at one point I decided to stop it. I can hold fast to my beliefs about Scripture without being offended or angry when people don't agree with me. I wonder how many people I could have been witnessing to while I was busy cyber-yelling at other Christians that they obviously didn't understand God's Word as well as I did. So I did stop. I promised myself I would not shout my theological beliefs to or at anyone.

For a few years now, I have been content to be reformed in my own heart and not worry about reforming the Christ followers around me. I would just smile and think to myself, "It's okay that my friends don't agree with me...I know that the man I marry will agree with me." Well...that has yet to be seen. Tonight I yelled at my very wonderful, and very non-reformed boyfriend about Christ only dying for the elect. It was out of character for me and I am sorry I did it. More than anything, I wish he and I agreed on this, but we don't. It's not the end of the world. All of my hopes are not dashed. We do not need to raise our voices and say goodbye curtly because we believe different things about the Christ in whom we both do believe. But that does not mean we smother what we strongly believe for the sake of smooth sailing.

I firmly believe that God, in His sovereignty, predestined His people for eternal life with Him through no action or choice of our own, but through the faith that He gives us, according to the greatness of His grace and mercy and love for us. I believe that apart from being chosen by God, there is nothing Man can do to be saved. I believe Christ died for His people and His people only. I believe God is completely sovereign, and there is nothing that happens outside of His perfect plan. I am more than well aware that there are many who disagree with me here. I'm cool with that. But I hope I never again yell those things to anyone, let alone someone who means so much to me. If you believe differently from me, by all means let's talk about it. But let's not yell. I'm not a fan of yelling, even when it's coming from my mouth.

I forgot with which point I was going to end. I'm not sure all of this flowed together or even makes sense. The important thing is that Christ died for us, and in Him we have redemption. Let's talk about that!

"Unless I am convinced by proofs from Scriptures or by plain and clear reasons and arguments, I can and will not retract, for it is neither safe nor wise to do anything against conscience. Here I stand. I can do no other. God help me." Martin Luther said that.

Love,

Shelley

let's talk about virginity

*DISCLAIMER: I am not hating on purity rings, or people that wear them...as always, just my thoughts*

I got you with the title, didn't I? Of course I did.

Someone very special to me asked me recently if I have ever worn a purity ring. Simply put, no. Not because I don't believe in the sanctity of marriage or the value of purity. I have three reasons for not wearing a purity ring.

1) I never got around to getting one when I was younger.

As I got older, I decided not to get around to getting one. Because:

2) To me, wearing a purity ring seems like the pretty equivalent of wearing a sticky note on your forehead that says, "I AM A VIRGIN. GO AHEAD AND ASK ME WHY." ...Do I need people to ask me about my sex life, or lack thereof? MOREOVER, is one of the functions of a purity ring an excuse for teenagers to talk about sex? Sorry, but I don't necessarily want the first thing that people think when they see me (and my purity ring) to be, "She's got a purity ring. She's a virgin." Stay classy, Planet Earth.

3) If I did want the aforementioned thought to be the first thing people notice about me, then as a Christian, the fact that I am not wearing a wedding ring SHOULD be evidence enough that I am, in fact, a virgin. Since when do we have to wear a purity ring to let people know that we're remaining pure? Why can't we just BE PURE!

Of course I believe in purity. Of course I believe true love waits. But that doesn't mean I want to have a conversation with any random person that happens to notice a purity ring on my finger about how I'm waiting to have sex until I get married.

Love,

Shelley

Miracle of Miracles

New Years Resolutions and such

I'm sitting in my newly married sister's house in Oklahoma. After an 11 hour drive yesterday, we're all just relaxing today. It's a nice break.

2010 is over. I feel really good about that. God taught me so many things...there were triumphs and disappointments, wins and losses and hard things to learn, but I'm grateful for 2010. I'm also grateful that it's over.

For 2011, my chief resolution is to be a better witness. I'll be the first to admit that aspects of my recent behavior do not lend themselves to the cause of Christ. This will be my primary focus for the new year.

I'm reading a book I got for Christmas, Quivering Daughters, by Hillary McFarland. Hillary has been a Godsend to me for the past few months...while several people were key elements in my healing process, Hillary's influence and graciousness helped me work through my emotions and let go of my bitterness. Her story is amazing...the ease with which she forgives and loves and gives grace constantly inspires me. Please read her book.

I hope 2011 is wonderful for all of you. I'll be enjoying taking it easy in cold Oklahoma with my sisters, almost-sister and cousin for the next few days. God bless you all.

Love,

Shelley

Christmas Eve

My blog has lain dormant for almost a month. I have been very busy. Now, here it is, Christmas Eve. I am so filled with gratitude, love, peace and joy. If God is with us, who is against us?!

This is one of my favorite Christmas songs.

It was not a silent night

There was blood on the ground

You could hear a woman crying

In the alleyway that night

On the streets of David's town

And the stable was not clean

And the cobblestones were cold

And little Mary, full of grace

With the tears upon her face

Had no mother's hand to hold

It was a labour of pain

It was a cold sky above

But for the girl on the ground in the dark

Every beat of her beautiful heart

It was a labour of love

Noble Joseph by her side

Calloused hands and weary eyes

There were no midwives to be found

On the streets of David's town

In the middle of the night

So he held her and he prayed

Shafts of moonlight on his face

But the baby in her womb

He was the Maker of the moon

He was the Author of the faith

That could make the mountains move

It was a labour of pain

It was a cold sky above

But for the girl on the ground in the dark

Every beat of her beautiful heart

It was a labour of love

Little Mary, full of grace

With the tears upon her face

It was a labour of love

~Andrew Peterson

God is so good. I've questioned Him so many times...and for what?

For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans to prosper you and not to harm you. Plans to give you hope and a future. Jeremiah 29:11

Glory to God in the highest, and on earth, peace among men on whom His favor rests.

Merry Christmas to you all, and God bless us, every one.

Love,

Shelley

My Own Personal Saboteur, or Why CJ Is My Least Favorite Sister

My sister CJ has been married and gone for almost two months now. So naturally, I thought that it was time for me to start taking over a few of her many responsibilities, one of which is making the world's most amazing bagels. So yesterday, I asked her for the recipe, which she kindly (or so I thought) posted on Facebook for me. Here is what posted:

Bagels, in small terms for Shelley.

5 c hot water

2 T yeast

Dissolve yeast in water.

Add:

8 scant cups flour

Cover and let rise till doubled in bulk and very bubbly.

Add:

3 T yeast

1/4 c honey

8 c flour

It's ok if you can't stir all the flour in. Turn it onto the counter and knead it in until dough is very firm and stiff.

Divide into 32 equal pieces. Roll each piece into a ball. Poke a hole in the middle of each ball and stretch out the hole till it looks like a bagel. Cover and let rise till they're as big as you want them.

Fill dutch oven about halfway with water. Boil. Reduce to heavy simmer. Put bagels in the boiling water. Boil on each side 2-3 minutes.

Put boiled bagels on baking sheets that have been greased and sprinkled with cornmeal.

Bake at 425 till they're done. How long? I have no idea. Just till they're brown and look done.

If I had been a little bit more intelligent (if you know me, say nothing), I might have caught the malicious glitch above. But I did not, and I made my bagels, following this recipe exactly. I only had to call her ONCE to make sure I was doing it right. She evilly assured me that everything was going just fine. Feeling rather good about myself and my bagels, I put the first batch in the oven. After a conspicuously long time of them not looking done, I finally pulled them out, only to realize with horror that they were ROCK. HARD. Blerg. I must have overbaked them. No problem, I'll get it right the second time around. So I put the next batch in and hoped for the best. In the meantime, I crack open one of my fossilized bagels, found it to be slightly soft in the middle, and tasted it...or, I tried to taste it. What I tasted reminded me of water. Or dirt. So in a frenzy, I call my dear sister--the sister I rely on for nearly everything, and thus went our conversation:

CJ: Hey! Did they turn out okay?
Me: NO!
CJ: Why? What did you do? (Notice how she tries to pin this on me)
Me: I don't know! The first batch came out and they're completely hard, so I thought I had overbaked them, but I tasted them and I can't taste anything! Was I supposed to put salt in them or something??
CJ: Yes! Of course you were!
Me: Well it's not in the recipe you gave me.
CJ: Yes it is.
Me: No it's not. I'm looking at it right now.
CJ: Oh no.....oh crap.....
Me: What?
CJ: I put yeast instead of salt!

At this time, I'd like to invite you to revisit the recipe above, and notice that yeast appears twice in the recipe--the first time, like normal, dissolved in water. But the SECOND time, my friends, THREE EXTRA TABLESPOONS mixed in with honey and flour. You guessed it--that yeast was supposed to be salt. Which accounts for the bagel being rock solid, the lack of flavor, and the fact that they were ENORMOUS.

Me: ARE YOU SERIOUS????
CJ: *uncontrollable laughter with interspersed "I'm so sorry!!"s*
Me: I hate you so much. What am I going to do with 32 huge hard nasty bagels??
CJ: *see above*
Me: You are the worst sister ever.
CJ: Oh my gosh, that's so disgusting! You put five tablespoons of yeast in the bagels??
Me: Don't try and make this about me. WHO is the blonde sister now?!

So 32 bagels (some cooked, some not) went into the trash. It is my firm belief that CJ felt threatened by my mad baking skills and didn't want me stepping on her finest work, so she sabotaged me on purpose. She would do that. You know she would. She's just that evil.

Ugh.

I miss her so much.




Love,
Shelley

a grateful people

Thanksgiving is here...I'm giving thanks. I have been blessed with so much--more than I could ever ask for. It's definitely been a rocky year, and God knows I've not been quiet about it, but today, I'm reflecting on things I am thankful for.

• Christ
• Freedom
• Grace
• John and Cathi Warren...for everything and more
• Siblings: Aubrey Russell; Kristen Slaughter; Annie Welty; Cathryn Longenbaugh; Nathan Warren; Beth Warren; Caleb Warren; Timothy Warren...I couldn't begin to imagine a better group of people to call my brothers and sisters
• In-laws: Dirk Russell; Dave Slaughter; Caleb Welty; Tony Longenbaugh...for taking such good care of my sisters
• Nephews and nieces: Jonathan; David; Joshua; Isaac; Abigail; Samuel; Molly; Warren; Henry; Carrie; Liam; Baby Slaughter; Erin; Judah; Savannah; Longenbaby...you light up my life
• Dear friends: Cheyenne Sabo; Hannah Cisarik; Chris White; Hayden Fletcher; Cristen Gauthier; Rachel Wells (and many others)...I can't tell you how incredible these people are
• My job and the fabulous girls I work with...I know God put me there and with them for a reason
• My piano...for still being there for me, whenever I need it
• My church family...what an excellent, loving group of believers
• The girl at the Starbucks in Barnes&Noble at La Cantera...she always knows what I'll order, and she always makes me smile
• Lewis Wells and Hillary McFarland...God uses these amazing Christians in such astounding ways
• My red platform heels...they make me feel pretty
• My adorable pink computer...for not dying...yet
• This blog...for helping me keep track of my rambling, disorganized thoughts

I hope your Thanksgiving Day is filled with 100000000009 reasons to be thankful.

Thank YOU.

In love and thanks,
Shelley